Everything Is ‘Different’

When I was a teenager – that magical age of experimentation, you know – I dabbled in a few forms of ‘chemical stimulation’.  I once took this weird stuff called LSD. Fortunately or unfortunately, I did not experience any hallucinations, astral projections, loss of coordination or sense of time, or any of those supposedly common effects of that particular drug.  Not one.  Maybe because I took a fairly mild dose?  I don’t know.  No matter.  However, I did have an ‘experience’, one that changed my life – or at least my perception of it.

There were two primary effects of my ‘trip’ that I clearly remember.  One was relatively mild, and very enjoyable: the impression of aliveness that everything took on around me.  Animals, plants, light, people – their ‘energies’ were dramatically enhanced, more so in my perception than any time since early childhood (though not as much as was caused by another hallucinogen I delved into a bit more enthusiastically, the magic fungal matter. . . ).  The other effect, the most profound, was much more subtle.  I felt that many old, previously ‘solid’ structures in my psyche had been softened, weakened, or thinned out, like strong old bone tissue that has been decalcified.  Some of those psychological structures/supports actually seemed to completely melt away into nothingness.  Like I said, it was very subtle, almost undetectable, but I just knew that something profound was taking place deep within the recesses of my inner Being.  As a result of this ‘clearing’ or ‘cleansing’ or whatever it was, the doors and windows of perception did indeed open up quite a bit, and I saw the world around me in a whole new light.  I was easily able to ‘see’ the emotional and energetic interactions between people, and felt strangely mature and sophisticated, as if a whole different personality had emerged within me and been brought to the surface.  To this day I can’t quite put my finger on exactly what was going on during those 8 or so hours of ‘frying’.  Some people that I interacted with could feel this change, this difference in me – which was very . . . . . nice, actually.  But most people, even my close friend who accompanied me on that journey into an ‘alternate reality’, didn’t really fully pick up on it.

After the effects of the drug wore off, I slowly returned to my previously ‘normal’ state of being . . . . but with a very palpable difference.  My personality was basically the same, my body was the same, my emotional state was well within the range of what had always been normal for me.  However . . . . . and this is something that I’ve never quite been able to quantify or characterize . . . . everything just felt a little bit different. 

And here I am again.  This time, however, I haven’t touched a hallucinogenic substance for over 25 years (that I’m aware of at least . . . .).  The last time I saw a ‘magic mushroom’ was in a dynamic, multi-colored screen saver image on my wife’s phone!  But after this last round of portal openings and solar coronal mass ejections and waves of Cosmic Energy from the Galactic Core that we’ve gotten bombarded/bathed with of late, that old sensation of ‘weirdness’ has pervaded my existence once again.  Everything just FEELS different, you know?  The animals appear unusually human in their ‘personalities’, the colors and scents of the plants and flowers are exceptionally vivid and vibrant, and I’m even feeling more plainly and poignantly the ‘vibes’ from my fellow humans.  On top of that, all my old reference points for what reality is ‘supposed to’ look like are gone.  The feeling of detachment from the more mundane aspects of daily life, even the entire material world itself, is very pronounced at this point, too.  My capacity to make long-term plans is simply not there, as is much of my short-term memory (Darn it, where did I put those scissors this morning?  And who was I supposed to call again???).

Lots of other changes, both overt and subtle, have worked their way into my daily awareness.  It’s like someone slipped a hit of Purple Microdot into my homemade lemonade a few months ago, and the effect still hasn’t worn off!  I have come to the point where I really, truly feel some kind of deep, fundamental TRANSITION is taking place – and I’m floating through it without a single rope to tie me down to anything ‘solid’ (in this world at least).  It should be pretty darn fascinating – and exciting — to discover what bizarre type of ‘reality’ lies on the other side of this journey through limbo land . . . .

Fortunately (and thankfully), I believe that I know the source of this ‘weirdness’.  And it’s all good!  The biggest and most pleasurable difference between my ‘old reality’ and this ‘new reality’ is the overwhelming waves of LOVE and JOY that hit me on occasion, often for no ‘logical’ reason – and the boundless physical energy I seem to have most of the time (except when the pressure in my head gets too much, like yesterday evening, and I just have to lay down and meditate or sleep till it passes).  The bubbling up of all those old, unresolved ‘issues’ from my past life/lives can definitely be disturbing, especially when they affect my wife and little daughter.  But fortunately, I’ve done enough internal work, and had enough deep training and practice over the last 20 years, to avoid allowing those difficult little ‘episodes’ to last very long, or do any real harm – even when they are manifested ‘externally’, like by decidedly egotistical, fear-driven neighbors who invade my private property and remove my source of potable water when I leave my home for a few hours.  Ahhh, thank the Multiverse that that kind of crap is supposed to be ‘resolved’, on a planetary level, by the end of this coming year!

How are you feeling these days?